so i watched backup plan the other night with my man. And boy does that relate to how i feel right now!! things are awful awful awful and then that great moment comes and its all worth it!! i think i cried and laughed!! (note to moms with children... it does have some bad language and behavior!!) anyways this morning was one of those great moments!! i went into john's room to feed him around 6 and of course he gives me that big toothless grin i absolutely love!! i pick him up and he actually rests his head on my shoulder normally its cranking and turning to see everything around him but for just that minute or so he was mine all mine!! funny how those small great moments make it all seem possible!!today was a great day!! i didn't do a thing but spend time with john! i can't tell you how much i wrestle with staying at home or working!! its such a hard struggle!! days like today make it really tough to go to work the next day!! aaaahhhh its all in God's hands! He knows my every thought and desire!! well its time to head back upstairs! mike is watching john. well i should say john is sleeping in mike's arms and that just warms my heart!! i love my boys so much!!
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